Getting My Ass Kicked

Dear the Internet,

When it comes to playing sports in general, I would give myself a B-. I, unfortunately, wrestled in high school, so I don't have a whole lot of skills that carry over to playing sports socially. For some reason, nobody ever wants to start a recreational wrestling team or go and have a wrestle at a picnic. Most of what I've learned about how to play different sports comes from playing pick up games in college. This means that if you're looking for somebody to do a layup or juggle a soccer ball or do anything with grace, I'm probably not your guy.


I say all of this because my friends and I have been playing in an indoor soccer league for the last couple of months. We've kind of been getting slaughtered, but it's good fun. My super awesome girlfriend plays too and, unlike me, she actually has skill. I don't have the best ball handling abilities, but I tend to be a pretty strong defensive player. I like playing defense because there doesn't seem to be as much pressure and it fits with my natural ability to get in the way. All self deprecation aside, one big reason that I like playing defence is that I get to watch the opposing team try to form some sort of attack, and then I get to come in and do my best to screw it up. I think it really plays to my inner asshole. I also really enjoy trying to figure out what another person is thinking. A big part of being a good defensive player in any sport is learning how to read your opponent. All in all, I've come to grips that I won't ever be a super star in any sport. I get in my own head too much to really be shine when the spot light is on me. I drew myself playing goalie and getting scored on because, well, that happens a lot. I'm not the greatest keeper, but I'm not terrible. Like I said before, I get in my own head a lot, and the mental game is huge when playing goal keeper.